I've been playing a lot this week and weekend. Playing on that line between failing and failing. I have had some AWESOME days this week, when things actually fell into place and I felt I was on a good path. And I have had some days where I felt like throwing in the towel. I guess this is recovery, that this is what it's like to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and keep walking. Dr. C says that recovery is like going up a mountain, but the road is not straight, it has bumps and holes that you fall over and climb out of.
I hate bumps and holes.
For right now, all I can do is keep going. I need to remember that a stumble is not a failure, it's me learning how to do things a better way. I need to learn that when I am in the hole that I HAVE the coping skills to get out; I just need to use them.
(Wow, this is a really positive post for me. Don't worry, it really is me....just in a good place. I am sure I will be back to blogging in a more negative place later in the week :) )
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